Friday Fun: Audio lyrics

Audio Engineer Shitposting on Facebook has a competition:
Turn any famous song lyrics into a bad mixing advice.

The original examples were those:

Whoa, we’re half way there
Whoa oh, don’t eq your snare

She was a streamer girl he was a pirate boy?

It gave me inspiration to make some of my own mixing parody versions of some known songs:

Shot through to red
And gain to blame
You give LUF a bad name (bad name)
I play my part and you play your game
You give LUF a bad name (bad name)
Hey, you give LUF, a bad name

No promises
(No demands)
No demands
(LUF is a battlefield)
LUF is a battlefield
Whoa

We are strong
No one can tell us we’re wrong
Searching our sound for so long
Both of us knowing
LUF is a battlefield

I would do anything for LUF
Anything you’ve been mixing of, but I just won’t do that

-

Mixers on arms

Those mist covered stages
Are not home for me
But the home is the hifi
And always will be
Some day you’ll return to
Your home and your hifi
And you are no longer burn to be
Behind the mixer

Through those sounds of destruction
Mixing is fire
I’ve witnessed your suffering
As the sound raged high
And through they did hurt sound so bad
In the fear and alarm
You did not desert mix
My mixers in FOH

There’s so many different sounds
So many different bands
And we have just one mix
But we live in different ones

Now the sun’s gone to hell and
The lights riding high
Let me bid you EQ
Every sound has to die
But it’s written in the mixer
And every line in your mix
We are fools to make war
On our brothers on stage

-

DI of tiger

Rising up, back on the sound
Did my time, took my chances
Went the distance, now I’m back on my mix
Just a man and his tools to survive
So many times it happens too fast
You change your gain to distortion
Don’t lose your grip on the dreams of the past
You must fight just to keep sound alive

It’s the DI of the Tiger
It’s the thrill of the FOH!
Rising up to the challenge of our mixing
And the unknown PA
Stalks his prey in the night
And he’s watching us all with the eye of VU meter

Face to mic, out in the snake
Hanging tough, staying decent
They stack effects ’til we take to the mix
For the kill with the skill to survive

-

Band, just killed a mix
Put a comp against it’s head, pulled my trigger, now it’s dead
Band, mix had just begun
But now I’ve gone and thrown it all away
Band, ooh, didn’t mean to make you cry
If I’m not back again this time tomorrow
Carry on, carry on as if nothing really matters
…
We will not let you go (let me go)
Will not let you go (let me go)
Never, never, never, never let me go
No, no, no, no, no, no, no
Oh, mamma mia, mamma mia
Mamma mia, let me go
Beelzebub has a devil put aside in sound, for me, for me
…
Nothing really matters, anyone can hear
Nothing really matters
Nothing really matters to me

-

Mix with one ear open
Gripping your mixer tight
Clipping light
Enter night
Take my hand
We’re off to never-never land

-

It’s gonna take a lot to drag me away from mix
There’s nothing that a hundred tracks or more could ever do……

-

Cupping mic, feedback loop
Firing at the ones who mix
Mixing hard, as bulletproof glass
You shoot me down, but I won’t fall
I am titanium
You shoot me down, but I won’t fall
I am titanium

-

You, you have, you have mic, you have mic

Will you hold the microphone correctly on stage like I demanded?
Nein!
Nein!

-

Life is an EQ
I wanna tune it all night long
If you’re goin’ my way
Well, I wanna tune it all night long

-

And Harry doesn’t mind, if he doesn’t, make it right
He’s got a daytime job, he’s doing alright
He can play the EQ like anything
Savin’ it up, for Friday night
With the mixers
We’re the Sultans of Sound

-

Them fat bottomed mixes (fat bottomed mixes)
Fat bottomed mixes
Yes, yes

-

This does not need changes to give bad advice or gritty view to AV business:

Don’t stop, make it pop
DJ, blow my speakers up
Tonight, I’ma fight
‘Til we see the sunlight
Tick-tock on the clock
But the party don’t stop, no

I wanna know what LUF is
I want you to show me
I wanna feel what LUF is
I know you can show me (hey)
Gotta take a little time
Little time to master the mix
I’ve got nowhere left to hide
Looks like LUF has finally found me
In my life, there’s been bad soundchecks and pain
I don’t know if I can face FOH again
Can’t stop now, I’ve traveled so far
To master this horrible song

Must have been LUF
But it’s over now
Lay a whisper on my mixer
Leave the noise on the ground
I wake up lonely, this air of silence
In the bedroom and studio
Mix me now, I close my sound
And dream away

It must have been LUF, but it’s over now
It must have been good, but I lost it somehow
It must have been LUF, but it’s over now
From the moment we mic’ed, ’til the fame had run out

Make-believing record together
That I’m sheltered by your mix
But in and outside it turns to not good
Like a teardrop on your board
And it’s a hard mixer’s day
I dream away

It must have been LUF,…

EQ , EQ , EQ
The country where I want to be
Mixer racking or mixing or just watching T.V
EQ, EQ, EQ
It’s the country for me

You’re so near to Roll-off
So far from Joyful
Quite a long way from Crisp
Lots of miles from Veiled